Monday, December 29, 2014

Jesus Promises the Holy Spirit

John 14:15-31
15 "If you love me, obey my commandments. 16 And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. 17 He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth. The world cannot receive him, because it isn't looking for him and doesn't recognize him. But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you. 17 No, I will not abandon you as orphans -- I will come to you. 19 Soon the world will no longer see me, but you will see me. Since I live, you also will live. 20 When I am raised to life again, you will know that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you. 21 Those who accept my commandments and obey them are the ones who love me. And because they love me, my Father will love them. And I will love them and reveal myself to each of them."

By obeying God the Father, through the relationship with God the Son, we begin doing the works of Jesus through God the Holy Spirit, that of which lives in us. The way Jesus is always with us is through the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit acts as our Advocate, our Counselor. This is the way we receive God's Wisdom and Truth. The Holy Spirit acts as a compass of emotions, thoughts and actions. Through the Holy Spirit, received by the acceptance of Jesus Christ, our sins are revealed to us. This allows us to come before Jesus and ask for forgiveness of our sins by confessing. This cleans us before God the Father. When we enter into a relationship with Jesus, we come to know God -- the closer we are to Jesus, the closer we are to God. Through this closeness, obedience begins to take place, an act of love, but one must obey God's commands in order to be close to Him.

God has been working hard on revealing the Holy Spirit to me in new intimate and wonderful and truly AWESOME ways. The last few months, He has led me to the truth that the Holy Spirit prays the unutterable prayers in our hearts -- AS AN ADVOCATE FOR US. I have experienced this, having been made aware in an amazing 'AHA!' moment. I was in a very painful relationship for years, one that I felt stuck in.
I. Wanted. Out. 

But...God wasn't ready for me to be free of that relationship, or that person. For whatever reason, He needed me there and I trusted that God knew what He was doing. So, I obeyed and endured. Of course, to me it was a very long time.
My mantra became: Focus on God!
If I focused on God, there would be no time for me to focus on my pain, my distaste, my unhappiness with the situation. I prayed, fervently, for the Lord to bless my time with this person, that He would bless the words coming from my mouth, keep my mind off of what I did not enjoy, and center my time with this person around joy.
Focus on God! 
I desperately needed peace of mind and heart with every interaction I had with this person.
Focus on God! 
I came to dread the moments I would have to 'entertain' this person.
Focus on God! 
I began feeling fake-ish.
Focus on God! 
I knew I was obeying God, but I wasn't sure how to be 100% true to my God-given self.
Focus on God! 
I continued focusing on God and His plan, to keep me from getting stuck on the circle of confusing questions, trying to understand things that were non of my business to understand. This was hard.
Focus on God! 
This was painful.
Focus on God!  

There was this one week where multiple events took place, involving said person of this painful relationship, that truly offended me -- I felt betrayed. Betrayed in a way I had never felt before. I remember not being angry or hurt at what the person did -- honestly, I wasn't surprised at this point in the relationship, based on past experienced, that this person performed these acts of betrayal -- but I was incredibly hurt that God wanted me to be in a relationship that caused me such excruciating pain. On the one hand, I was pretty impressed that I wasn't focusing on the person that hurt me, or letting myself get angry at what the person did. On the other, I couldn't understand how God could put me in such a position to cause not only me such pain, but my family, too. This is where I came to understand the pain I was experiencing was a spiritual pain. I had faithfully been obedient to God in this relationship, never taking a step away until He gave me permission. Why would He want me in a relationship that reaped this much pain? Here I was, in a place where the idea of looking this person in the face made me physically sick. This person was a liar, this person was manipulative, this person was greedy. I felt this human relationship was at a tipping point of conflicting with my relationship with God...or so I thought.

I prayed in sobs, gut wrenching sobs, for days. I needed God to do something. I did not know what. I'll be honest and say, I really feared He would expect me to continue to endure. I didn't know what that would be, knowing I didn't want to, but knowing God would figure it out. I cried out my pain to Him. I asked many questions, never expecting an answer (something I've learned over the years: be honest about what you feel in your heart and speak them out to God. You may find that once you share your fears with yourself, confessing them to God, you are freed from the fear).

A couple of days after learning of said betrayal, God convicted me to walk away from the relationship. That's it. It was such a sudden and strong COMMAND. I immediately felt relief! In that moment, I let go. I felt special, loved, joyful and lifted! In my heart, I walked away from that person, that relationship. I didn't worry about the repercussions of walking away from that person and the hold they had on me. I didn't concern myself with explaining myself to that person. I didn't get caught up in how this might affect the person I was finally free from -- that's for God to deal with. I remember laughing when He revealed to me that He answered my unutterable prayer-- the one the Holy Spirit prayed for me. The prayer that even I had no clue I needed prayed. When I cried out to God, I didn't know what His answer would be, because I didn't have a question. I just asked for His will to be done, while pouring my raw emotions out to Him.

To this day, I have no idea why I had to endure such a stressful, painful and exhausting relationship. And, you know what? I don't need to know. God knows and that is good enough for me!

Thank you, Lord Jesus, for loving us so that we might have life. Thank you for the Holy Spirit, speaking the words we know not to the loving Father. And thank you Father, for giving your only Son, so that we may have a relationship with You, through the Holy Spirit. AMEN

1 comment:

  1. What a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing your story. I can't tell you how encouraging it was to read it. Blessings to you... :)